Testify!

POLITICAL SCENE

"THIS IS ABOUT THE STUPIDEST PIECE OF LEGISLATION I'VE ever heard in my life."

So began Tom Retzlaff 's public testimony before the state Senate Criminal Justice Committee on a recent Tuesday afternoon at the Capitol.

The bill in question- House Bill 1666- seemed unremarkable. "Relating to the prosecution of the offense of online impersonation," read the bill caption. A House committee had approved the legislation unanimously, and the full House had passed it on an uncontested voice vote. It seemed unlikely the bill would face opposition in the Senate. Retzlaff was the only person signed up to testify, and if he hadn't said anything, the bill would have flown through the Legislature almost unnoticed.

State lawmakers file thousands of bills every session and pass hundreds of them, most with little debate. In the case of HB 1666, sponsored by Democratic Rep. Joaqu�n Castro of San Antonio, citizens could land in prison for up to a decade for impersonating someone else online.

"I really think it's stupid, you know, straight up," Retzlaff said. "You're talking about putting someone in prison for 10 years because of Facebook?" He made clear he wasn't representing anyone but himself. He said he was currently unemployed, but added he was working toward his master's in business administration. "I happened to have some free time this afternoon. I heard about this bill and figured I'd waste an hour and come down here."

It's rare for a member of the public to testify at the Capitol about such a little-known bill. Lobbyists or representatives of advocacy groups offer most of the testimony at committee hearings. Retzlaff 's appearance was so unusual that it prompted Sen. John Whitmire, the Houston Democrat who was chairing the supposedly public hearing, to ask, "How'd you hear about this?" On the Internet, of course. Retzlaff had signed up on the Capitol web site to receive email alerts on pending bills. He didn't like the look of HB 1666.

"Craigslist- this kind of stuff- is no different than the old bathroom wall," he said. "I could drive up and down 1-35 and say, 'For a good time, call Tom,' and put a phone number on there." That, Retzlaff noted, would just be considered graffiti, a misdemeanor. "But because it has something to do with the Internet ... we create a moral panic about it."

But what if- asked Sen. Kirk Watson, the Austin Democrat and the bill's Senate sponsor- someone posted a Facebook page about Retzlaff that said he wanted to abuse children? "You don't think that ought to be punishable?" Watson said.

Retzlaff conceded it should be against the law, but not a third-degree felony, which HB 1666 made it. "You're talking about 10 years in prison at $20,000 to $30,000 a year," he said.

"Well," Watson said, "if you think this legislation is the stupidest you've heard, you need to be paying more attention."

"Yeah," Retzlaff said. "There are a lot of stupid things that happen here unfortunately." - DAVE MANN